Molly: The Love is Gone
It's no secret that I am a sincere reality TV dating show fan. I don't watch The Bachelor or Love Is Blind "ironically" because I think even in lackluster seasons of these shows, what's going on can shed some light on human relationships, love, and desire. As far as most fun to watch, though, I have definitely become a Love Island partisan. Love Island is interesting because it is both more and less fake than the shows that hold onto something resembling traditional values (LiB, Bachelor shows, Married At First Sight, etc). The contestants are more real than the citizens of Bachelor Nation, despite being some of the hottest people you've ever seen and banking just as much on social media clout. The premise is more openly fake, with a cash prize on the line for the winning couple. The real money for breakout stars of both franchises is in continued fame, appearances, and sponsorship deals. It's possible and probable to go on both shows for the "wrong reasons," but Love Island wears its ulterior motives on its sleeve and is more authentic because of it.
Gaming the system looks different for each franchise. On The Bachelor, you have to become an attractive partner for the lead, whether that means playing up physical attributes, mimicking someone else's values, promising to move for love, or any number of things. Increasingly, winning The Bachelor does not have much to do with a long term relationship, but if you want to catapult yourself to that spotlight, you have to fake it enough to make it far, or else be such a character that you get put on Bachelor in Paradise. Blah blah blah. Love Island, on the other hand, involves an intricate dance of romance, votes from your fellow contestants, and votes from the public. To win Love Island you have to, at least some of the time, be in a relationship that people like, be a person your direct competitors like, and be a person the audience likes. If you game the system to win Love Island, you deserve it.
Still, if there were not a hint of real romance, we wouldn't keep coming back to these shows. They are at their best when moments of real vulnerability break containment. But, for me, they kind of suck lately! This summer I have watched both Love Island USA and Bachelor in Paradise, whose recently revamped format is in the back half of the season. Bachelor in Paradise especially has been disappointing for years now. It used to be the best show in the franchise. On The Bachelor/ette, contestants are cast by producers for the lead, but on Paradise, you get to see who has actual chemistry when men and women from different seasons are thrown together. The last season that was good, for my money, was summer 2021. There were a lot of engagements, one couple is still together and married, and another got together after the show and are now married with a baby, but mostly it was the last time the show was genuinely horny. One of the existent couples, Mari and Kenny, overcame conflict and sincere sexual jealousy that involved Kenny sleeping with another woman while they were on a break.
this man's face never moves
Did anyone even have sex in the subsequent seasons? They certainly aren't now. There are very few eccentrics left in Bachelor Nation, and on the current season, everyone is too composed and calculating for their own good (and our entertainment). Sure there's jealousy and drama but it doesn't seem like anyone's heart is it. The biggest deal has involved the man of a couple hiding the fact that he really wanted another girl to stick around and was thinking of his current partner as a safe choice. She is sympathetic and likable, but there's no chemistry or stakes in the relationship. The guy, who just skulks around dead-eyed, does not show real emotion through his subtle botox. BiP has seen the success of Love Island and redone its formula, adding slicker editing, "sexy" challenges, and a cash prize, but a lot of it isn't quite working. Nobody is horny or smitten enough to use these challenges as ways to explore physical or romantic connection. It's just a collection of single gym rats lounging around and trying to strategize.
Love Island USA suffered some of the same emotional detachment. Like BiP, islanders are together 24/7. Unlike BiP, they are on camera all the time, including the night vision camera in the bedroom where couples share a bed from day 1. People definitely have sex on Love Island, whether as a step in a romantic journey or just kind of because. But this season saw very few couples "closing off" until the very end. They were "open to exploring" past the point where there was really anything to explore, and the boys' ringleader, Ace, seemed hell bent on eliminating exclusive couples. The winners of the season, Bryan and Amaya, won because Amaya was a fan favorite. This has happened before - Love Island UK season 5's winner, Amber, was a day 1 islander who was prickly, fiesty, and couldn't seem to catch a break. Fans loved her and were happy to see Greg, a latecomer, at least pretend to appreciate her. UK season 8's winners, Davide and Ekin-su, never seemed like a real couple, but they created a compelling lovers-to enemies-to friends-to lovers storyline. The same season's Casa Amor (a week where the guys and girls are split up and tempted by new islanders) was genuinely shocking and dramatic because of the real romantic stakes involved. Love Island USA this year wasn't as bad as the current Paradise, but this season of USA just lacked heart.
That's why the standout story of the reality show summer washed over fans like water in a desert. Through a contrivance of the producers, islanders Nick and Olandria got a chance to avoid elimination if they coupled up with each other. The pair, who had been friends since day one, took the offer. Fans started to point out that in challenges, Nick never missed an opportunity to kiss Olandria. It even seemed like Olandria might have liked Nick in the beginning, but stepped away when he was already in a love triangle. For most of the season Nick was in a relationship with Cierra, including after the Nick-Olandria save. Olandria spent at least half the season trying to make it work with Taylor, who gave her nothing. Cierra got yanked off the show when social media posts with racist slurs were discovered. It wasn't a satisfying romantic plot, but it did seem like maybe Nick was never that into her. This gave Nick and Olandria the chance to couple up again, and they agreed to stick together at least as friends. They ended up in second place.
The reason Nicolandria was so compelling is because in a sea of contestants trying to play it cool and obsess with how they come across, his overwhelming attraction to her won out. Anytime they were in the same room he was in awe of her beauty and her presence. It was wonderful to see Olandria, a dark-skinned black woman who had been out of luck most of the season, in a genre of TV that often fails to protect black women, be treated like a goddess (and she is like...most of us may never see someone that beautiful in person beautiful). Nick, a cute, curly haired fuccboi nurse from Florida, was never unlikable but his charisma and chemistry with Olandria shot his stock way up. I would be pleasantly surprised and happy if they last as a couple beyond the show, but mostly I was just so relieved to see a man be actually into a woman. Real desire!! Not whatever this is.